Dear Samsung Salesman

Dear Samsung Fridge Salesman,

We Are No Longer Friends.

I know it’s been about a year since we last saw each other, and I haven’t written or called.

Sorry about that.

Actually, it’s been 1 year and 2 weeks since we last saw each other. I know that, because the last time we talked, you were selling me a new Samsung refrigerator. And my warranty just expired 2 weeks ago.

You know, the refrigerator you told me was “top-of-the-line.” The most expensive one at your store? You know the one.

Well, I’ve been mostly happy with it aside from a few issues…

It doesn’t chill my food for one thing. I don’t know what the current trends are with “top-of-the-line” refrigerators, but I don’t know if I’m a fan of the “keeping my food and drinks at at a cool 58 degrees Fahrenheit” fad. Call me old-fashioned, but I feel like my leftovers don’t keep as long, and I prefer my milk to be a little colder… and less solid.

I would just put ice in my milk and not complain, except that my freezer doesn’t actually freeze anything. No, the freezer keeps all my frozen goods at a chilly 58 degrees Fahrenheit. I don’t want to be nitpicky, but I think the freezer is normally colder than the fridge.

The icemaker doesn’t make ice either, but I pulled a MacGyver today, and just chipped some of the wall of ice on the back of the fridge into my drink. It freezes over every few days, so I always have a good supply of ice forming on the outside of the freezer.

These new-fangled “top-of-the-line” refrigerators have some interesting design decisions though. I mean, cold on the outside, warm on the inside? It’s almost like it’s less of a refrigerator, and more of a box that food just goes bad in.

That’s kind of what has me peeved with you, actually. As you may remember, I did come into your store looking for a refrigerator. And you sold me a Make-Food-Go-Bad box.

I do really like the water dispenser though. I can start pouring a glass of water, plan my daily schedule, read the newspaper, organize the spoiled food in the fridge, watch a movie, and then 30 minutes after that, I have almost a full glass of water.

And if I don’t want to stand in front of the refrigerator all day, it has the neat feature of constantly leaking water, so I can just leave the glass on the floor in front of the fridge, and come back for it later. Refreshing!

Now, I’m not blaming you, refrigerator salesman. You might not have seen the hundreds of scathing reviews online. And how could you have known when Samsung doesn’t even mention these issues on their support page.

How could you have known?

But now that you do, I’d like your word that you won’t try to sell anyone else one of those Samsung Make-Food-Go-Bad boxes.

Sincerely,
Guy Who Wanted a Fridge